Candy canes and killer clowns.

Juffalos and juffalettes.

Juggalo City by Theresa M. Weinman (smokey_gurl)

Now, I'm a juggalette from a city of sorts. I've done my time and I've been to the courts.
There's no place like home, no weed like home grown, and if you're coming to my town you best just go home.
Yeah they say the place is haunted. Ghosts of a thousand year's torment taunted.
Why, you ask, is this place so unsafe? Cuz I torched it, fucker, and burned my victims at the stake!
I smoked their bodies, until I got high, then I threw them in a pile. A sacrifice to shangrilah.
I hunted survivors until they'd all been hacked! Chopped them into pieces like a little nutcrack.
But if you wish to continue, and that's not such a pity, then I welcome you all to the juggalo city.
Come on in. It's the juggalo city, where the weed is good but the food is kinda shitty. The carnival twists at the hands of wicked clowns. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.
Come on in. It's the juggalo city where, under the moonlight, the blood looks pretty. The water runs dry, and murder is a thrill. If the carnival don't getcha, the boogy man will.
A couple came by, just cruising for a place to fuck. I crept up from behind and chopped them up in their truck.
They never saw it coming, had no chance to scream. Such a fuckin bummer, that would've been a dream.
I dug through the bloody rubble until I found a head. Once I let it marinate I fed it to the fucking dead.
I polished off the rest myself, the guts were pretty gritty. But I'm hungry again, so come to my city.
Come on in. It's the juggalo city, where the weed is good but the food is kinda shitty. The carnival twists at the hands of wicked clowns. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.
Come on in. It's the juggalo city where, under the moonlight, the blood looks pretty. The water runs dry, and murder is a thrill. If the carnival don't getcha, the boogy man will.

(copywright proof. Writtin by Theresa M.Weinman "smokey_gurl")